Simply Jennifer: Books

I finally finished Captivating. It took me a bit longer than usual. For one thing, I didn't ever bring this book inside the house...I read it everyday while waiting in line to pick up Ryan. I was reading in little chunks...a chapter or less a day, which is unusual for me. I also read slowly so I could soak up some of the ideas in the book. There was no rushing through this one for me. There were days I would laugh out loud while sitting in my car...other days I'd cry like a baby. This book touched me on so many levels and really has me reexamining some important parts of my life. I fully intend to reread it...I think it's one of those books that deserve at least 2 readings...but Shane's going to read it first.

As I've said, this book really took me deeper inside myself. A couple of weeks ago, I shared an excerpt of the book. Here's another that really made me pause and realize that maybe I'm doing a better job at this life thing than I thought.

"Carol has a bright mind and a keen intellect. A favorite among her professors, she graduated from an Ivy League university at the top of her class...The sky is the limit for Carol. She reads constantly. She is aware of international events and analyzes world twins...And she just gave up what looked like a golden career move to stay at home full time with her son.

There is nothing on Earth Carol would rather do--yet it was an incredibly difficult decision to make. She has hopes and desires to pursue a higher education. There is much that she wants to do, to learn, to experience. She has given up so much of her own life in order to bring life to her little boy. Learning to mother her child is requiring more of her heart and soul than she thought possible. God called Carol to the high position of mothering, and she is choosing to die a thousand small deaths to her self every single day while at the same time falling ever more in love with her son.

Carol chose to say "yes" to God and followed his lead into the hidden life of a sty-at-home-mom. God is meeting her there. In the hiddenness, she is discovering the holy. And she is playing the most irreplaceable, essential, powerful, life-impacting role imaginable."

Yes, this is one of the chapters that made me cry right there in the line to pick up Ryan. I didn't graduate from an Ivy League college, but from a pretty darn good one. I had a career I loved. Even though I'd had my two children, I continued working. Until April, when it seemed that God gave me no choice other than to follow his lead. I knew, as did Shane, that I had to leave my work and stay home with the children. So I did. Do I want more? Sometimes. There are things I want to do, learn, experience, just like Carol. But I know there will be time for all that later. Right now, I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be. And even on days when I'm pulling my hair out because the house is a mess, toys are everywhere, kids are fighting, and I'm exhausted, I still believe I am playing the most irreplaceable, essential, powerful, life-impacting role imaginable. It doesn't get any better than that.

This book that I'm reading, Captivating by John and Stasi Elderedge, has so many interesting points and is making me think so much outside my comfort zone. I would seriously recommend this book to any woman...and then pass it on to the significant other in your life and make him read it as well. I'm not even close to being done, but there is one passage so far that has really stuck out for me.

"Why do so few women have anything close to a life of romance? Loneliness and emptiness are far more common themes--so entirely common that most women buried their longings for romance long ago and are now living merely to survive, get through the week. And it's not just romance--why are most of the relationships of women fraught with hardship? Their friendships, their families, their best friends all seem to have come down with a sort of virus that makes them fundamentally unavailable, leaving a woman lonely at the end of the day. Even when relationships are good, it's never enough. Where does this bottomless pit in us come from?

And women are tired. We are drained. But it's not from a life of shared adventures. No, the weariness of women comes from lives that are crammed with routine, with chores, with hundreds of demands. As Chekov said, "Any idiot can face a crisis. It's the day to day living that wears you out. " Somehow, somewhere between our youth and yesterday, efficiency has take the place of adventure."

Of course, the book goes on and talks more in depth about this...but as I sat reading over it for the first time, I had chills. It so describes my life and the lives of nearly every woman I know. I wonder if all women (or most) are feeling these things somewhere deep inside? And, I wonder why? Why aren't we ever satisfied? I think that's the question I'm going to seek to answer.

Here's the book, linked, in case you are interested.